had a talk with one of my boys today. good convo. told him about what went down with the last guy. he made me see things in a way i’ve never really thought about. guess cuz he is a guy + can relate to the dude’s side. kinda made me feel bad though. cuz he told me that i should had expressed my feelings to him + i didn’t. and now i kinda wished that i did. maybe he would have been down to take things to another level. but i will never know.
all day i kept replaying one of the last times we hung out. he could tell something was wrong + i kept on saying oh it’s nothing i wanna discuss right now. but i keep on thinking that maybe that was my chance to tell him how i really felt about him…i was just so scared of rejection, of not hearing what i wanted to hear that i did not say anything. but it sucks cuz now i will never know how he felt.
been thinking about calling him + just telling him. would that be wise? would that make sense or even make a difference? i guess in some way it would cuz i would get it off my chest. finally. but of course, the scaredy cat in me always wins when it comes to luv.
